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Three Reasons Toddlers Bite - Part 1

This is the first article in a three-part series in knowing why children bite and how to stop the behavior.

The long hard day is finally over. You walk towards your toddler's classroom looking forward to some cuddle time. As he runs into your arms you see swollen, tiny teeth marks and you know he has been bitten - again. The only thing worse, is noticing the familiar pattern of your child's teeth on his best friend's cheek.

Toddlers bite. Knowing why can help. The victim is the first concern, but parents and teachers are disturbed as well. Angry parents may want the biter expelled, but the embarrassed parent of the biter is equally distressed and anxious to resolve the problem. When biting escalates, the parents of both the biter and the victim loose trust in the teacher's ability to supervise the class.

Three Reinforces for Biting
While a few very young children bite because they are teething, most toddlers bite because they receive reinforcement (reward) for biting. There are three basic sources of reinforcement:

• The Stress Reducer: When children feel uncomfortable, their stress level rises. This may happen when they are crowded, hungry, tired, frustrated or when the noise level rises. Grown-ups don't have a monopoly on stress! Since problem solving and language skills are immature, some children discover that a good, hard bite makes them feel better. Biting becomes an isometric exercise; every muscle in the toddler's body tenses as he clamps down. The release results in a feeling of relief and relaxation. Removing the reinforcer is difficult since it is built into the act itself. The victim is totally innocent and, because the bite is especially hard, it often bruises and may even break the skin.
  --The reinforcer is a reduction of stress.
• The 'Get What I Want' Bite: When a child wants to take something away from another child, she may bite, wait for the victim to drop the toy and then snap it up while the victim runs for help. The toddler wins at least a few joyous minutes with the toy of her choice. Again, the toddler has learned that biting is a sure fire way to get her needs met. This is the most obvious form of biting and sometimes gives alert adults at least a second to intervene.
  --The reinforcer is time with the toy.
• The Busy Box Bite: The toddler's job is to establish autonomy - independence. We don't need a textbook to tell us that toddlers are struggling for power - parents and teachers see it everyday! Our job is to work together to create an environment where toddlers can have freedom to explore and investigate their environment in safety. Toy manufacturers spend billions of dollars each year capitalizing on the toddler's urge to experiment with cause and effect. The busy box is just one example of a toy designed to respond to that urge. Children learn that "When I push the button, the door opens." Unfortunately, some children also learn that "When I bite, my victim screams, teachers run and I am in control." This is a powerful feeling. Toddlers that bite for this reason are not crowded, or tired, or angry. The bite may be less severe that the Stress Bite, but comes without any warning. To the inexperienced caregiver, it may look as if the child bit for no reason at all. The victim is, again, totally innocent and might not have been playing with the biter.
  --The reinforcer is power and the attention from significant adults.